Take responsibility for the uncomfortable questions.

Be bold and brave enough to ask. Develop your skill in how to ask and knowing when to ask.

Here's a small example: Friend A told me about a New Year's party that Friend B was hosting. Friend B and I haven't been in touch, and there's been an unspoken tension between us for years. Friend A expressed that he didn’t want to ask on my behalf and suggested I reach out to Friend B myself.

Fair enough. So I sent Friend B a text to ask if the invite was open to others.

No response.

And that’s okay. I won’t lie—it stings a little. But that’s the cost of inoculation, the ticket to a life of bravery and greater self-control. It’s worth the cost of admission.

I prefer knowing that I asked. There’s discipline in reminding any wounded inner child that rejection is not personal. Rejection doesn’t make Friend B a bad person, either.

Things change over time. You never know how the dynamics may shift in a different season.

Next time you feel tension, be brave enough to address it. Not for others, but for yourself.

This is how you show up for yourself. The rest lies in refining your approach and processing the results.