You don't need to throw an event to enjoy time with your friends.

In cities like SF or NYC, there’s always something going on — and sometimes it feels like the only way to spend time with friends is by joining the buzz. The simple hangout doesn’t feel like enough.

I had a conversation with a friend who's an event organizer about community building. When we were planning an event together, one thing she said struck me — she wanted to make sure the event felt worth people’s time — that they’d want to come back.

That conversation made me realize how much pressure we put on ourselves to host "good" events — as if every hangout needs to be curated, memorable, Instagram-worthy. There’s something at stake — our reputation for the kinds of parties we throw. If the vibe is off, people might not come back. It feels almost primordial: if we don’t host well, we risk being left out — and as social animals, that feels dangerous.

But here’s the thing: sometimes, you just want to see your people — but don’t have the bandwidth to plan. I didn’t want to throw a curated party, and I didn’t want to chase another event just to make it happen. I just wanted to be with them.

A principle I've been practicing: don’t overthink it. Just show up — even if it’s mediocre. I texted a few friends, made a quick Partiful invite, and said: let’s go. Minimal preparation — cleaning my place and a trip to Trader Joe's for snacks and frozen kebabs.

No programming. The main event was being together.

Ten or so friends came by last night — some brought fruits, salad, and other dishes. We snacked, dined, had tea, and chatted for hours. Once it got rolling, the night carried itself. It made me so damn happy to see people I love. And they had a great time eating and meeting new people.

Today, on the morning after, my heart is full.

So here's my takeaway: building community doesn't require pageantry. It can be as simple as just inviting people over.

Sometimes all we need is each other and a space to be together.